Questions for Parents
What if my baby is intersexed?
The birth of a child should be a wonderful event and should be celebrated regardless of whether or not they are intersexed.
If your child is born intersexed it is ok to feel confused and scared. Fortunately there is a lot more known about intersexuality than there was 20 years ago. Children who are born intersexed are typically healthy and require no surgery. Intersexed people can live full and fulfilling lives which include creating positive sexual and social relationships with others.
If your child is born intersexed it is important to find a doctor and a psychologist that have experience working with intersexed children and their parents. Intersex South Africa also offers support groups for parents and intersexed people in communities around South Africa. Check-out the links on our website to find out more about intersexed people.
If you want help finding a doctor or psychologist, more about the support groups, or if you just need support, please get into contact with Intersex South Africa either via email or by phone.
"Toolkit for parents"
What options are available for my child?
Intersexed children are typically healthy and require no surgery. Un-necessary, non-consensual genital surgery to make an intersexed child’s sex organs look male or female has been medically proven to be unhealthy for intersexed person’s sexual, emotional and physical health.
Intersexed children can grow-up creating positive social relationships without having genital surgery performed.
Genetic tests and the history of other intersexed people with the same condition should be used to assign the most likely gender (girl or boy) for a child. However no test is 100 percent accurate and your child may choose to change their gender at a later stage in their life.
It is important that intersexed children and their families receive education, peer support and counseling around the issue of intersexuality. Intersexed children should be educated about their condition and be empowered to be proud of who they are.
Could being intersex harm child? Is it painful or physically dangerous?
No, being intersexed is not painful or dangerous.
What other resources and websites exist to help me learn more as a parent of an intersexed child?
Parents of children with ambiguous genitalia
home.vicnet.net.au/~aissg/Ambiguous%20Genitalia%20Parents%20Guide.pdf
For Parents: Alice Dreger
www.alicedreger.com/parents
Check-out our links page to learn more about intersexed issues.
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What is more fluid, more yielding than water? Yet back it comes again, wearing down the rigid strength which cannot yield to withstand it. So it is that the strong are overcome by the weak, the haughty by the humble.
— Lao Tse
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